Being the boss at home

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JJ Parker  0:02  
So a while back, I had to sit, my wife and my kids down for a family meeting. Oh, because I felt things were getting a little bit out of hand. And we needed to apply some basic management rules and structure to our family. Ah,

Melissa Albers  0:23  
how did that go?

JJ Parker  0:25  
It didn't go that well, I

Melissa Albers  0:27  
can't believe it.

JJ Parker  0:28  
You know, I thought like, Hey, we're, you know, we're running the traction process at work. Why can I just apply this? At home?

Melissa Albers  0:36  
Yes, yeah. And of course, my

JJ Parker  0:38  
wife lovingly robbed me that I cannot run our family. Like I run my business.

Melissa Albers  0:46  
I will also admit to being in my kitchen once and my family saying stop bossing us we don't work for you.

JJ Parker  0:55  
So apparently, making their transition from a leader at my company. And the way I interact with my family is not as smooth as I think,

Melissa Albers  1:09  
leaders just like the kings and queens of multitasking and shifting on the fly all so smooth, and you know, looks awesome all the time? Probably not? Probably not, probably not.

JJ Parker  1:20  
So let's talk about dealing with that shift between maybe how we're interacting at work, and the kinds of things we're working on, at work and mean into our, our family in our home space. Yeah,

Melissa Albers  1:34  
I think it's so much related to energy. I mean, I really think it's related to energy, because you can be on a zoom call, or whatever you can be having these meetings. And even if you're crabby, the minute that screen turns on, you're on, right. So you're used to shifting back and forth like that. It's like, Oh, I got a meeting that I'm running this, I'm going to be cool, I got all that I'm going to be in a great mood, and you're just not. But you forced that out, you do that on and off throughout the day, you start to get more tired, because you're yanking that energy back and forth. And then all of a sudden, the day's over. And now you have a choice to make, right? Because you're going to go back in and interface with your family for the rest of the evening. I just think that's a hard, you know, we say like, there's certain strategies to do, which of course, will, you know, mentioned a couple here, but I think it's a hard thing to do. It's not always an easy transition to make.

JJ Parker  2:26  
And as leaders in our company, you know, what I find is that the kinds of problems that I deal with during the day, it's hard to turn my brain off at 5pm. Oh, like, these are just things that, you know, it's it's not like, Hey, I, you know, I did this job for eight hours a day stopped went home, I could forget about it, because it's all still loaded in my brain and my brain still working on it. So yeah, it's a lot of us don't have the luxury of leaving work at work a lot of times because a sentence in your head ship, right is just with you. So we have to actually manage that transition and, and certainly recognize in ourselves and be aware that we're still processing a lot of things that happened during the day when we're trying to interact with our family,

Melissa Albers  3:18  
right. And I really do think that this changing reality that we've been in, has taken even the most proficient at multitasking and compartmentalizing, it's taken even the most proficient of us and rolled us down a hill. It's really, really well,

JJ Parker  3:37  
nowadays with so much remote work, right? A lot of us are working from our houses. So my commute? Yeah, from the office used to be 30 minutes where I could actually kind of decompress and maybe shift my energy a little bit to five seconds walking up the stairs.

Melissa Albers  3:55  
Yeah. And then I think you do feel guilty, like you really feel guilty if you don't step into that family structure, as the member of the family that you're supposed to. So there's some guilt around that too, which then will also force an energy that doesn't really feel good within us for sure. So I just think that we are constantly talking about being aware, but I really believe that that we have to continually check in with ourselves we have to become habitual about doing that. Because as things are shifting and making us uncomfortable, the more aware we are we can simply slide back and forth it becomes easier and easier. Anyway.